I'm not apologizing for going "post-less" so let's be forgiving and just go with it, no questions asked. Confession, I can't get out of my head. I've been in there for weeks maybe even months at this point. Thinking, contemplating, wishing, dreaming, doubting etc... It's time to get out. I can't make this a habit because I'll never leave and really it's no way to live.
In all honesty, I want so much, maybe more than I should be allowed. It's not like a Christmas list, these desires are beyond anything I could have ever imagined for myself. It scares me that I have these "needs" these untapped feelings that conflict with my reality.
Even more contradictory is the fact that they are entirely unwarranted. I don't sit and ponder new demands for my life but am daily rushed with images of absolute wonder...I've never dwelled on such high expectations.
I know, I know...my knack for saying so much without really saying anthing is astounding and it's a slow start but a fresh start none the less.
its good to have you friend. to read your words. to see a glimpse of your heart. oh how i have missed you.
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